With qualifications like ICWA and MBA in Finance, Priya Krishnamoorthy took corporate life head-on as she spent 8 years at one of the topmost Information Technology multinational companies in India.
With her family, trekking groups, by backpacking with friends and with a corporate grassroots awareness program, Priya has covered a lot of India since she was 7 years old. While at her job, she's been excellent at negotiating for leaves to make her travels happen.
Despite being successful at her job, Priya yearned to be an entrepreneur and find more time for long term travel. After supporting her husband to pursue his shot at freelancing, Priya too took the plunge and quit her job once they were financially abundant and when the two decided to travel around India for a year on their own plan, without help from any travel companies.
Nowadays, Priya is enjoying life with her husband as they pursue ideas on self-planned travels, entrepreneurship, passive income and how to get better at life. She writes about her learnings in this blog. Besides she also looks for regular people who found inspiring success and writes their story in the Hero's Journey section.
If I got paid Re.1 for every time I heard people say ‘Travel is my passion’ I’d have been a millionaire..no wait..a billionaire may be. But most of them do not pursue their travel passion it due to lack of time, expenses, not having sufficient holidays, spouse not willing, friends ditched at the last minute, parents said no and several other excuses we generally find for not pursuing what we want to. But do we really need to travel to experience the joy of travel?
Why do we travel?
We travel to meet new people, experience new things, learn new skills, be exposed to a whole new world. But is it mandatory to travel to be able to do these things? Is it not possible to do this in the place we live?
Have you heard of people come back from long trips and say ‘Travel changed us. We are now better people’. What does travel do to change you ? We had written about our learning from India360earlier. But this time I want to give a very objective view on how travel can change you based on a renowned model of measuring personality traits Continue reading How India360 travel made us better?
Malcolm Gladwell, in his book ‘David and Goliath’ covers the story of unlikely success. Instead of the cliche of how persistence and hard work pays, he analyzes the stories in depth and brings about how the underdogs chose a different path to win the game and how this learning can be used by us all.
Critical feedback is hard to accept for anyone, not just you. It hurts to know that you are not perfect, the world is not love in with the way you are. And unlike many cliches, they are probably right and it is up to you to make changes in your life for the better. For all its obviousness, it is still not an easy thing to do. So if you are sitting in front of the one who has given the feedback, thank them and tell them you will seriously consider the feedback given to you.
Try not to feel enraged and get defensive. Don’t get apologetic without understanding thoroughly. Don’t try to pass on the blame or call it a misunderstanding by the other person. Just breathe and let the feedback sink in your head.
We often work hard to get noticed. Dress up well to get attention. But many times we are uncomfortable when finally the hard work pays off and attention is showered on us. We deny, deflect and feel uncomfortable with the attention and praise. It is surprising yet true, that compliment more than insults unnerve us and take us by surprise.
Lets look at what are the appropriate ways to take a compliment
Accept and say ‘thank you’
Often ‘Thankyou’ with a smile is the most sincere way to accept a compliment. You may elaborate on the thanks but never negate the acceptance.
Compliment: “That’s an excellent presentation. You really owned the crowd.”
Bad response: “Thanks. But i forgot a few points in between. I think I could have done a lot better.”
Good response: “Thank you.” Better response: “Thank you. I am glad you liked it”
“Thank you. I really worked hard on it and am very happy to know I got through to the audience”
We saw how to give praise and Feedback the last few weeks. In the next couple of weeks, lets look at how to receive them and what to do with it. When and what to consider and what not to ?
We seek advice and feedback often when we are unsure of our future course of action. Sometimes people add relevant perspectives that we had never considered. They challenge the way we look at our world and bring clarity. Sometimes they leave us even more confused and are best ignored. But how do we know when to do what? Am I ignoring an advice because it makes me uncomfortable or if it is not relevant to me?
Providing feedback the right way is a critical part of the job of a parent, teacher, manager, friend, customer etc. Feedback provided the right way can help one to deepen relationships and become better at tasks at hand. A botched up feedback can turn a reluctant person into a rebel, beginner struggles into permanent disinterest and wasted talent. Last time we looked at ways to keep people motivated through right praise, let us know look at a even more vital aspect of sharing feedback the right way.
When to give Feedback:
Only when appropriate:
When your spouse is asking you about her new haircut, she is looking for validation and not feedback. It’s not much different from when your 5 year old artist shows his new painting. Distinguish between validation seeking and feedback seeking and act accordingly.
To share our sincere praise to someone is the best way to make them like us and listen and adhere to our requests. But delivering the praise has multiple aspects to it, that we are not normally taught. While it is of no need to mention a list of benefits of praising someone, delivering it incorrectly, can backfire badly. So let us look at various aspect of delivering praise.
How to Praise?
Like a fake smile, a fake praise is often easily deciphered by the person who it is addressed to. Even if it works in the short term and you derive benefits, in the long term, you are bound to be caught someday and it may really badly backfire.
This book has been the most embarrassing book for me to read ever, for it showed me the mirror. In effect it was deeply revealing, it gave me a perspective into how I had been looking at several things. Dr. Carol Dweck’s research has been the most revealing and explained many of my bizarre moments of life.
Personality Mindsets: Fixed Vs Growth
People with fixed mindsets believe that abilities are frozen in stone. Most of their efforts are spent in trying to prove themselves. People with Growth Mindsets believe that we can change and improve with practice.
In 1990, life expectancy in our country was at 58 years, while the retirement age was between 55 – 60 yrs in various state and central government jobs. Many people died before they retired. We had movies on withdrawal symptoms after retirement and how the erstwhile who’s who coped up with inactivity and lack of importance. Since that generation had steady pension and a huge Provident Fund, usually financial trouble was not one of the problems they faced post retirement. This was despite being predominantly a single income family with several dependents.